Skip to main content

Do cats know you love them? These 6 strategies really work

You naturally adore your cat, but what if he doesn’t return the same affection? “How to make my cat love me?” is a common question among cat owners, so if you’re looking for ways to bond with your cat, you’re not alone. Cats can be naturally reserved and even standoffish, so if your cat isn’t outwardly affectionate, that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t return the sentiment. Do cats know you love them? Most likely, yes, but they also have different ways of showing their feelings in return. Still, if you put these six tips to work, you can show your cat how you feel about him in multiple ways.

Spend time with your cat

Spending time with your cat is one of the easiest ways to bond with him. Make it a goal to spend time playing with your cat every day. Buy some fun cat toys, like wands, so you can encourage him to play. You might want to get some catnip so you can give it to your cat each day. Soon, your cat will start to associate spending time with you with positive, fun things like playtime.

Woman standing on a porch holding a cat
Image used with permission by copyright holder

Provide tasty food

Feeding your cat is another great way to bond with him. Buy him some tasty food that he enjoys, and pay attention to his favorite flavors so you can give him more of the food that he likes the most.

Recommended Videos

If you live in a household of multiple people, then being the one who always feeds your cat can help you develop a bond with him. Your cat will come to know that you’re his caretaker, and he’ll seek you out when he’s feeling hungry. He’ll also recognize that you give him the food he loves and may start to see you positively because of that association.

Offer treats

Treats also can help you develop a relationship with your cat. You might need to experiment with different types and flavors of treats before you find the one that your cat truly adores, but once you have the right treat, your cat will be crazy about treat time. When you feed treats, it’s important to do so in moderation to avoid upsetting your kitty’s stomach. Consider feeding treats out of your hand for extra bonding benefits with your cat.

Learn your cat’s body language

Taking the time to learn about feline body language can help you better understand your cat and what he’s communicating to you. With this improved understanding, you can better recognize when your cat’s uncomfortable or when he might be asking for attention or affection.

Consider watching some videos about cat body language or reading some articles or books. Then, spend time just watching your cat. See if you can recognize those body language signals throughout the day.

Create a safe environment

For your cat to feel affectionate toward you, he needs to feel safe in the home. Look for ways that you can create an environment where he feels safe.

Your cat will naturally feel safest when he’s up high and off the ground, so provide a cat tree or perches that your cat can use to get up and above all the action. Give your cat a spot in the home that’s all his own, like a cat bed in a quiet corner of your bedroom. This allows him to retreat to a safe space when things get busy in your home and your cat needs a break.

Grey and white cat lying down with a wooden heart ornament
Image used with permission by copyright holder

Respect your cat’s boundaries

It’s also important to respect your cat’s boundaries. If your cat seeks out some time alone, then respect that. If his body language is telling you that he doesn’t feel like being social at the moment, then it’s important to back off and give him some space. In turn, when your cat is feeling affectionate and social, you can respond to that by giving him the attention that he’s looking for, keeping him happy, and helping him feel heard and understood.

There are many ways to bond with your cat and show him that you love him. While you can put all these tips to use, it’s most important to be patient and give your cat time, especially if he’s new to your home. Some cats take long times to adjust to new situations, and in most cases, the more space you can give your cat, the sooner he’ll start to feel comfortable in your home. Remember that some cats just aren’t terribly affectionate, so even if your cat doesn’t seek you out for pats or want to cuddle with you, that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love it — or you. He may just show his love differently.

Paige Cerulli
Former Digital Trends Contributor
Paige's work has appeared in American Veterinarian, Business Insider, Healthline, and more. When she's not writing, Paige…
How to help your new cat settle in
Here are the steps you should take to help your cat feel at home with you
Tiger cat lying on a rug

Bringing home a new cat can be stressful for both you and your new furry family member. Fortunately, there are many ways you can help reduce your cat's stress and make the transition period easier. As your new cat settles in, he'll need some support from you, but he'll also need you to be patient with him. He's undergoing a big life change, and as excited as you are for him to be around, the best thing you can do is to give your kitty some time and space while he adjusts. He'll be roaming the house and hanging out with you soon enough if you follow these tips.
What is the 3-3-3 rule for cats?

If you have ever adopted a cat before, you may have heard this often-cited rule for settling in. The rule says that cats take three days to adjust to being in a new place at all and may seem especially hesitant and skittish.

Read more
8 halloween cat names you’ll love for spooky season and all year
Deck your black, white, or orange kitty up in fall style with a name to match
Cute cat in Halloween costume

If you're anything like us, you love Halloween — and so does your cat. A black, white, or orange critter will stand out this spooky season, complete with costume and a name that's on theme. This could look like a Jack dressed up as a jack-o'-lantern or a Maleficent wearing a cute witch hat. Anyone who loves this fall holiday will enjoy calling their kitty by an All Hallows' Eve style moniker year round. Here are the best Halloween cat names that we recommend for any creature.
Best Halloween cat names

Our list of names runs the gamut from pop culture to ancient. We're giving you the top choices so you can select the purrrfect one for your furry friend.
Cobweb
We absolutely adore this label for a kitty, especially because it's the name of the feline in Hocus Pocus 2. You might pick out this one for a black cat with particularly cool markings that will lend itself well to the theme.
Octo
The eighth month is eerie, and so this name fits perfectly for a sneaky cat who loves to pounce when you least expect it. This name could also work for a darling mouser that has eight distinct spots or a similar pattern.
Samhain
Give your fur ball a throwback with this pagan name that used to begin the night of October 31 and lead into the next day. Traditionally pronounced "Sowen," you can say it any way it rolls off the tongue.
Carrie
This one works well for someone who doesn't want their cat's identity permanently tied into October festivities. But every year around the fall, you'll get to go full Stephen King and break out your bloody decorations.
Salem
Made famous in the show Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Salem is a talking cat, and of course, the site of one of the deadliest witch trials in American history.
Black Phillip
A good fit for a feline that's all black with a gung-ho personality to boot -- name your cat after the goat from the movie The Witch and dress them up in horns for the occasion.
Elphaba
Give Wicked a try by adorning your cat with the main character's name, which is handy because you can also refer to them as the Wicked Witch of the West whenever that title applies.
Candy Corn
Last but not least, we have a lot of good names for black cats here, so we wanted to throw one in for the ginger fellows. Any orange and white striped cat would love to go by this famous candy.

Read more
How to tell if your cat is angry at you and what to do
Your guide to angry cat body language
Angry calico cat hissing

Cats can get the reputation of being perpetually grumpy and unloving. These are myths — cats can be playful and remain affectionate even after the kitten stage.

Yet, cats — like humans — experience various emotions, including anger. Even the cuddliest, most mild-mannered kitties have their triggers and moments. Unlike humans, cats can't tell you how they feel using words. Though cats can vocalize — and often will when angry — watching body language will provide the most clues into what your cat thinks about their current situation.

Read more